Sunday, February 1, 2009

2nd Post

Dear Nick (munchkin man),

Wow! I can't believe it has been two months since the day you were born. It seems like just yesterday. I remember that day, thinking that February seemed so far away. I remember all the doctor's telling me that you wouldn't be home until around your due date. I thought that was a lifetime away, and yet here we are, just a few weeks away. Time has gone by so fast and so slow at the same time. My wish right now is the next time I write a letter like this you are home, asleep in your bassinet as I type.

You have made amazing strides in the last month. I am so proud of everything you have accomplished. Your tiny victories mean so much to me. Actually, they mean so much to everyone around that loves you. Everyone constantly asks me how much you weigh now. Each ounce is a triumph. Each day you are off the breathing machine is a blessing. You have done an amazing job since you were born. I remember the doctor talking about all the things that could go wrong with you while you were in the NICU. So many of those things haven't happened. You have done spectacular.

I remember a particular conversation I had with your dad about 2 days after you were born. I told him that I just had this feeling that you were going to be the star of the NICU. That you were going to sail through the critical periods with no problem. I knew you were going to make great strides and not have any major setbacks. While the road hasn't always been smooth, I feel like you have done such a great job. All the nurses love you. They always tell me how cute you are, how great you are doing. The "attitude" that I mentioned in your 1 month letter, has almost disappeared. While you still get mad, it is a lot less often. I realize now, that I would probably have a little bit of an attitude to if I had someone messing with me as constantly as you did.

I started being able to give you a bath this past week. It seems like such a simple thing. I am sure a lot of parents take that for granted, being able to give their child a bath nightly. It has become the highlight of my day. You are so awake and alert afterwards. It is amazing. You look around and look at me. You seem so happy and relaxed after your bath.

It is getting so hard to leave you at the NICU. Sometimes I just want to sneak you out. I can't wait to cuddle with you and be able to hold you any time I want during the day. Sometimes it is so hard to leave you. I miss you so much. Before, it was easier because I knew that you had to be there. You weren't strong enough to be home. I know you still need to be there, but with each passing day, I see you getting stronger and I know the time for me to take you home is getting closer and closer. Maybe I am just getting impatient.

Your room is almost ready for you. As I type this, I have a large load of your laundry waiting to be folded. Your room has been painted and furniture put together, clothes are hanging in your closet and toys waiting to be played with. All I need now is you.

Nick, please always remember, that life's struggles are nothing compared to what you have already faced in your short life. You have already made it through so much, nothing can compare to this. You are a fighter and you always will be. I have been with you everyday, and will be for the rest of your life.

I love you Nick.

Love,
Mommy

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You know Jen, when you are gonna write stuff like this I need some warning, you know I am "sensative". Anyway that was very sweet. This blog is so nice for him to have as he grows up.